Monday, June 21, 2021

So You're a Fan?

My husband and I are members of a Brooklyn Nine Nine fan page on Facebook. It's a fantastic show and if you haven't watched it before, stop reading this and go watch it right now. I'll wait.

Well, not literally.

Anyway, we're on this fan page and at this point I think it's just so we can talk smack about the posts from the other fans. Instead of fun memes and jokes from the show, the majority of the posts fall into the following categories:

Confusion Regarding Acting

It's always a terrible picture of the show, paused on their TV to show an actor from Brooklyn Nine Nine appearing in another show. "Look who I found on Modern Family!" "Spotted Boyle in Pitch Perfect 2!" "Doug Judy was on Friends!" That's not an accomplishment. That's just how acting works. Throughout their careers, actors will appear in many roles. This fact is lost on the members of the group. Sometimes I debate blowing their minds by commenting regarding the existence of IMDB. 

Cluelessness of Guest Stars

I guess this is technically a subcategory of Confusion Regarding Acting. Some pretty big names have been on Nine-Nine over the years, but their fame is brand new information to members of the group. Celebrity guest stars who have flown under some of the group members' radar include: Jimmy Smits, Danny Trejo, Katey Sagal, Lin Manuel Miranda, Bradley Whitford. I will say that the comments on these posts are absolute gold. 

Unsure of the Definition of a Fan

These are the people who always post about what they don't like about the show and it always seems as though the things they don't like outweigh the things they do like. They post polls asking members to vote for their least favorite characters. Or complain about how Jake should be with Sophia and Rosa should be with Marcus. It's akin to someone saying they like Seinfeld but that all the scenes in Jerry's apartment are pure garbage and make them hate life. These posts can get intense. 

Failed Retcon Detectives

These people are the 5 Minute Crafts equivalent of fans. [Note to self: write a post on 5 Minute Crafts next week]. What I mean by that is, they're trying to solve problems that don't exist. Like when 5 Minute Crafts provides us with life hacks no one asked for or needed. A big one for these people is another detective character who is referenced during the pilot but is not included in subsequent episodes. If I'm not mistaken, this person didn't even have lines in the pilot. Another character says something like, "That's Daniels." And that's it. But to these super sleuths, it's something to be discussed. "Am I the only one who wants to know what happened to Daniels?" Yes, weirdo. You are.

And that's the fan group. If nothing else, it does provide my husband and me with something to laugh about.

Sunday, June 6, 2021


The TV of my youth definitely convinced me there were going to be a lot more live-in butlers in my adult life. Who's the BossThe NannyFresh Prince of Bel Air. Not once have I gone over to someone's house to be greeted by a middle-aged British man wearing a three-piece suit. No, the closest I've ever come to a butler is probably Ask Jeeves.

We all developed ideas of what adulthood would be like based on TV and movies. And while I can't speak for everyone else, most of my ideas turned out to be wrong.

Did I assume I'd one day have a spacious NYC apartment with the most idyllic purple walls? No. But I did assume there would be some sort of core friend group with whom I'd share the ups and downs of life. To put it plainly, no one told me life was gonna be this way [clap clap clap clap].

That's not to say I don't have friends, because I do. And I may be a bit biased, but I've always considered myself to be friend-worthy material. If I'm your friend, I'll be there for you. And I'm not just saying that to continue the Friends references. (OK, it's probably like 50% for the reference). But for some reason, I've almost always been the peripheral friend. I'm never part of the inner circle. If I happen to be present for an event, nobody is mad about it. Or if they are mad they keep it to themselves because, manners. But at the same time, they aren't mad if I'm not there either. When you're a kid, your friendships are very location-dependent. You're friends with the kids in your class or the kids on your street. And you might not even think about your school friends when you're not in school; as though they only exist in that building. And if you change schools or move, well those friendships are simply over. Sometimes I still feel that way.

I can't say as I have a "best friend". I honestly don't think there's anyone out there who would refer to me as their best friend. I did when I was younger, but not anymore. Technically, my husband is my best friend. But that's different. I was under the impression that you're supposed to have a best friend in addition to your spouse. Let's say I won to a show or something and he couldn't go, well I would be at a loss as to who would want to go with me. 

There are only so many times you can find out about an event you weren't invited to before you start to wonder if there's a reason. Am I coming on too strong? Not strong enough? The point is, I have no idea. I also have no idea how to finish this post. I'm not looking for pity or anything. I suppose this was just a way for me to get my thoughts out.

Space Race

Was there some rich white guy meeting that we didn't know about where they all secretly decided to get super interested in space all of ...