Monday, July 19, 2010

I Brake for Blogs

I've said it before and I'll say it again, I don't understand why people put stuff on their cars. I should point out that it was very hard not to end that sentence with, "man, I love being a Turtle." TMNT references aside, I always see strange bumper stickers, etc. on people's cars and I just don't get it. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely LOVE reading ridiculous bumper stickers.

I feel strongly about a lot of things, but not to the point where I need everyone behind me to know about it. I will admit, I just recently put a Georgetown College Alumni sticker on my car...but I've now got 2 degrees from that place, a small Tiger sticker felt appropriate. I'm much more likely to purchase a bumper sticker and tape it up to the fridge or my "command center" at work. That way, I can explain my viewpoints to people and force them to listen to me (not to mention hear myself talk). Anyway, I saw 2 humorous car accessories today that I feel compelled to discuss.

The first was a conservative bumper sticker:
I don't have much to say about this...but when I saw it as I walked into the hair salon I couldn't help but think, "I'm pretty sure everyone still has all those things." Am I wrong? That was rhetorical, I'm not wrong...I rarely am. Other than making a mental note to tell Amy Jo about that bumper sticker so she could mutter her favorite insult (Tea-Partier) that's all the thought I gave that one.

I had been planning to blog about this ever since the moment I saw it this afternoon. And when I made it my Facebook status, people "liked" the bejesus out of it, so that sealed the deal.
The other interesting thing I saw today was a license plate frame. I should go ahead and explain that I've never fully gotten the "I brake for this and that" paraphernalia. They're usually ridiculous; it's almost never an animal you see on the road. "I Brake for Moose," who doesn't brake for a moose? Where do you live that the moose to car ratio is so intense that it requires a political stance?

I'd say that the majority of the population brakes for any animal on the road. The slogans make it sound as though everyone else on the road is just running things over like crazy. If it's on the road and in my way, I will almost always brake for it. Have you ever seen one of those stickers and completely disagreed? "Hey, check this asshole out, he brakes for zebras! Zebras can suck it, I'll run 'em all down! I'm gonna follow this guy and run over all the zebras he brakes for!" I'm pretty sure that sentence has never happened in real life. I think the only time I'd ever have that mindset would be the day I see the "I Brake for Hitler" bumper sticker.

Back to the license plate frame. "I Brake for Trains". I was unaware that there was another option. In a car v. train scenario, you can either brake or die. That's it. A car cannot run a train over...a car can, however, ram into the side of the train and endanger the lives of everyone involved. I never thought I needed to advertise the fact that I will brake for trains, but apparently I do.

You read it here first, I brake for trains. I'm also pro-puppy, firmly against cell phone usage in movie theatres and like ice cream. Sorry to get so controversial.

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